Humor for the day

[beeker]

I've always wondered why they are referred to as Gen "Y" ... And Now I know !

People born before 1946 were called The Silent Generation.

The Baby Boomers are those born between 1946 and 1959.

Generation X people have been born between 1960 and 1979.

Generation Y were born between 1980 and 2010

Why do we call the last group Generation Y?

Y should I get a job ?
Y should I leave home and find my own place ?
Y should I get a car when I can borrow yours ?
Y should I clean my room ?
Y should I wash and iron my own clothes ?
Y should I buy any food ?

 

[pbal]

An 80-year-old couple was having problems remembering
things, so they decided to go to their doctor to get checked
out to make sure nothing was wrong with them.

When they arrived at the doctors, they explained to the
doctor about the problems they were having with their
memory. After checking the couple out, the doctor told them
that they were physically okay but might want to start
writing things down and make notes to help them remember
things. The couple thanked the doctor and left.

Later that night while watching TV, the man got up from his
chair and his wife asked, "Where are you going?"

He replied, "To the kitchen."

She asked, "Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?"

He replied, "Sure."

She then asked him, "Don't you think you should write it
down so you can remember it?"

He said, "No, I can remember that."

She then said, "Well I would also like some strawberries on
top. You had better write that down because I know you'll
forget that."

He said, "I can remember that, you want a bowl of ice cream
with strawberries."

She replied, "Well I also would like whipped cream on top.
I know you will forget that so you better write it down."

With irritation in his voice, he said, "I don't need to write
that down! I can remember that." He then fumes into the kitchen.

After about 20 minutes he returned from the kitchen and
handed her a plate of bacon and eggs. She stared at the plate
for a moment and said angrily:

"I TOLD you to write it down! You forgot my toast!"

[millcreek]

Joe Buck

http://bangcartoon.com/2010/commercial_break.htm

[millcreek]

I say this is the funniest one yet from our one and only psychopath.

"But, then, I can get it any time i want it. what about you"

[WDVE]

I say this is the funniest one yet from our one and only psychopath.

"But, then, I can get it any time i want it. what about you"

The killa must know a good madame...

[millcreek]

The killa most know a good madame...

And her name is

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3T-xEbF4kCU

[Alfred E. Neuman]

The Honeybadger

[Alfred E. Neuman]

Siamese twins walk into a bar in Canada and park themselves on a bar stool.

One of them says to the bartender, "Don't mind us; we're joined at the hip. I'm John, he's Jim. Two draft Molson Canadians please."

The bartender, feeling slightly awkward, tries to make polite conversation while pouring the beers. "Been on holiday yet, lads?"

"Off to England next month," says John. "We go to England every year, rent a car and drive for miles. Don't we, Jim?" Jim agrees.

"Ah, England!" says the bartender. "Wonderful country... the history, the
beer, the culture..."

"Nah, we don't like that British crap," says John. "Hamburgers and Molson's beer, that's us, eh Jim? And we can't stand the English - they're so arrogant and rude."

"So why keep going to England?" asks the bartender.

"It's the only chance Jim gets to drive."

[WDVE]

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman."

She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"

A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

[WDVE]

"I'll (Phil Rizzuto) never forget September 6, 1950. I got a letter threatening me, Hank Bauer, Yogi Berra and Johnny Mize. It said if I showed up in uniform against the Red Sox I'd be shot. I turned the letter over to the FBI and told my manager Casey Stengel about it. You know what Casey did? He gave me a different uniform and gave mine to Billy Martin. Can you imagine that! Guess Casey thought it'd be better if Billy got shot."

[WDVE]

Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Give a man a welfare check, a free cell phone with free monthly minutes, food stamps, section 8 housing, a forty ounce malt liquor, a crack pipe and some Air Jordan's and he votes Democrat for a lifetime

[WDVE]

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary 
Surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet
Pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's
Chest. 

After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and
Sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has
Passed away." 

The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?" 
"Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the 
Vet.. 

"How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean
You haven't done any testing on him or anything.
He might just be in a coma or something." 

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the 
Room.  He returned a few minutes later with a black
Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on
In amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his
Front paws on the examination table and sniffed the
Duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the
Vet with sad eyes and shook his head. 

The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out
Of the room. A few minutes later he returned with
A cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately
Sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back
On its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and
Strolled out of the room. 

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry,
But as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably,
A dead duck." 

The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys 
And produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.. 
The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!"
She cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!"

The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my
Word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the
Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $150." 

[WDVE]

A hooded armed robber bursts into the Bank of Italy and forces the tellers to load a sack full of cash. On his way out the door with the loot, one brave customer grabs the hood and pulls it off, revealing the robber's face. The robber shoots the guy dead without hesitation!

He then looks around the bank to see if anyone else has seen him. He sees one of the tellers looking straight at him; the robber walks over and calmly shoots him dead. Everyone by now is very scared and looking down at the floor.

"Dida anyone elsa see a my face?" calls the robber. There follows a tense minute of silence. Then an elderly Italian gentleman, looking down, tentatively raises his hand and says: "I tinka my wife caught a glimpse."

[Alfred E. Neuman]

Dave Chappelle - Rick James

...strong language

Prince vs Charlie Murphy

[Alfred E. Neuman]

...check out the guy in the red shirt................... .....this could probably be seen at PNC Park also............